Bomberman Land

Last summer, gamers from all around were consumed by Bomberman Live, the first true Bomberman for Xbox 360. The Live edition sacrificed the adventurous single-player modes – which had been both successful and disastrous on other consoles – in favor of multiplayer content.

In June, John Lee (VP of Marketing & PR for Bomberman Live) told GameZone why: “We did not include a quest this time around because no one ever associates Bomberman with a single-player mode. In fact, it’s probably the least requested feature. We’re talking about a game and a brand that pretty much created the party game genre, so we’ve focused on multiplayer this time.”

That’s why Bomberman Land, the series’ first multi-platform game this generation, has a dedicated multiplayer component. The gameplay is classic Bomberman action, and the 47 stages give you plenty of battle arenas. Inside are four modes: normal (last man standing), stars battle (grab the most stars), point battle (most successful attacks), crown battle (touch the crown first), and all-out battle (random rules). Game sharing is enabled for multiplayer enjoyment with those who don’t have a copy of the game.

If it sounds like this review was written in reverse – old content first, new content second – that's because I didn't want to lead with the Land portion of the game, which is less Bomberman and more of a novel. Not a novelty – an actual novel.

Bomberman Land begins with a library of text blocks you may have expected to see in a Nintendo game during the kiddie days of N64. The first reads: "The Bombermen spent their days living their happy, fun-filled lives as they always had. That is until one day when a latter arrived."

Soon the traditional white Bomberman is met by a black Bomberman (named Cool Black) and a pink Bomberman (presumably the lady of the bunch, named Cute Pink). Next up you'll encounter Giant Gold, a portly Bomberman; Bookworm Green, the apparent nerd of the bunch; and Kid Blue, a short Bomberman whose color also matches his name.

Two or three-dozen text boxes follow. Next up, a scenario with Cool Black where another 20 text boxes appear, leading to a slow-moving sequence with a plane taking off. Inside, 20 more text boxes. At this time, a few minutes have passed but no gameplay has occurred.

After the plane crashes into a giant bomb statue, an additional 40+ text boxes are displayed. There aren't many story developments – just the usual, kiddie-flavored words that are barely acceptable for a children's book, let alone a video game.

After that the game jumps to the top-down world map. There are five accessible locations: Area Gate, Bomb Statue (where you crashed), Waypoint, Speed Boat, and Ship. With the thought of explosive gameplay lingering in my mind, I ran to each point.

At the Bomb Statue, players are introduced to the director of Bomberman Land, an old fellow who looks like the Planters mascot. He flees the scene after saying a few things, none of which have any effect on the gameplay. In fact, actual gameplay has yet to be discovered.

Head over to the ship for another conversation with the director. Do the same at the Speed Boat location, and again at the other areas before finally making your way back to the Bomb Statue. Thirty text boxes later, the player is rewarded with a colored piece. It has the number 23 written on it, and may be used to access new areas in the game. By this time, several minutes have passed. I start to ponder the number of cola cans sitting in the fridge. Caffeine. I need caffeine.

Twelve new areas are opened after using the numbered piece, none of which are marked with the words "Play now!" or "Enter for excitement!" Instead, each locale is given a generic label (sign, bench, fountain, etc.) that fails to reveal the contents held within. To find the first seconds of gameplay, you'll spend several minutes visiting each location.

Pardon me, but do you know where the nearest gameplay is?

When you finally do reach the appropriate, mini-game-revealing area, the game plays a silly word game that must be solved before the mini-game can be played. To solve it, say "no" to every ridiculous question the character asks. Had I not revealed the solution, you'd have no way of knowing how to solve this puzzle – a sad truth I faced upon its discovery. Trial and error led to my victory, but not without one too many text boxes. It wasn't long before I wondered: is there any amount of caffeine that can keep players awake long enough to reach the first bit of gameplay?

Jump ahead several minutes and we're at the first mini-game: a single-car race across a short track. This game is played from a near-isometric view and controls like the Micro Machines racing game (and other similar racers). It's over in a minute or two, but the reading continues. You'll encounter several more text boxes – totaling in the hundreds and eventually thousands – as the next few mini-games are unlocked. They include a timing game where you'll have to knock five rectangles off a pillar without throwing off its head, and a puzzle game with a ball that needs to be tilted toward its goal.

There are dozens more to be unlocked, like a jump roping game that requires an insane amount of button timing. But the reward for all that textual nonsense is far less exciting than the addictive, genre-defining content the Bomberman series is known for. The mini-games are generic iterations of mini-games that can be found elsewhere. Aside from the name and appearance of the land's inhabitants, there is nothing here that will resonate with Bomberman fans.

Gameplay: 5.0
Bomberman Land or Bomberman Land of Nod?

Graphics: 4.0
The classic Bomberman content looks good, but the rest of the game is several stages below what the PSP can produce.

Sound: 2.0
No special music, sound effects, or anything memorable in this game.

Difficulty: Easy
Not much of a challenge.

Concept: 5.0
The classic Bomberman gameplay is great, but we’ve been there, done that. The new stuff, unfortunately, is also a been there, done that kind of experience but from games that have no relation to the Bomberman series.

Multiplayer: 8.0
Tons of fun, tons of stages, and game sharing is supported. No online play is offered, but the ad hoc capabilities (2-4 players) are pretty great.

Overall: 6.0
Bomberman Land will likely be viewed as a handheld gem to those that have enjoyed but never owned the original game. Its classic mode is very entertaining, and the game sharing feature makes it possible to play with friends who don't have the UMD. If that content is worth $30 to you, proceed to your nearest retailer. But don't let the "new" content have anything to do with your desire to purchase the game. For that alone, the price tag is much too high.